I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
