how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
