I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize