jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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