Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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