Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
