in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
