It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
