I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Randomize
