Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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