i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize