CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
