its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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