I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
