I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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