i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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