Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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