I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I looked at my own cervix.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Randomize
