PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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