My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
