bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
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My thoughts exactly.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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