i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I supernannyed him into submission
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
