I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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