she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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