Non-Jews are for practice
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
