im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
