Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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