I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize