I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
