Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Randomize