Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
