Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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