I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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