Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
