Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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