Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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