Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
