I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
