I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
