Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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