Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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