I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize