people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
