all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
