get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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