We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I think people are normalizing furries
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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