its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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