let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
