just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize