guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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