Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
My hand turned me down
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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